Hey Rob, it’s me. You know, I never really got to thank you properly for everything you did for me. Even though it’s been a couple of years now, I keep seeing your face whenever I go. It’s weird. I even hear your name and become emotional sometimes, for no reason. I don’t know Rob, it’s not that the time we had together was much but it meant a lot to me. You helped to break the spell I was under. You helped me get rid of him. I miss the way you didn’t let him intimidate you when we ran into him out at the bars. You were also so much fun Rob, god, you were great. You didn’t judge me because I wore a suit to work everyday. You saw right through my facade. You knew the girl I really was and you let me be myself. And you were so nice to me.
I miss the way you would walk by my office and smile. Without a pause, just a smile from the corner of your mouth. I miss those times we’d meet down the street on my lunch breaks and drive around the hills for half an hour, smoke a joint and share one of your Marlboro reds. Things were always better when I did them with you.
I remember the time we went to that Mexican place. Do you remember that? The food was shit but the margaritas were cheap. Remember how we couldn’t keep our hands off one another? Do you remember the sexual tension? You touched my leg and looked right into my eyes. Do you remember how we couldn’t even finish our second round because all we could think about was getting naked? I remember. I’ll always remember. I’ll remember driving down Pacific Coast Highway drinking beers and throwing the cans out the window. I’ll remember how you taught me to take a curve like a pro, “Lean into it” you’d say, “lean your body into the turn the opposite way.” I miss the late night walks on the beach we would take when we couldn’t think of anything to do. You even took me back to where you grew up and introduced me to your mom, and it wasn’t scary. She was cool, like you, which makes sense and she told me I could visit again whenever I wanted. I wonder how she is these days.
We sort of broke up you know, if you can even call it that. It was a mutual thing, I remember, but I can’t remember why. I suppose it’s just they way things happened. When I realized you were gone, it was hard on me. I’m sorry Rob. I’m sorry I didn’t make it to your funeral. I had all of these mixed emotions conflicting in my head. But just know, I tried to go. I really tried to come to terms with it. You weren’t my boyfriend and you weren’t my ex. You were just a guy I knew well for a short time. But sometimes it’s not the length of time that matters. It’s the quality of time. That’s what we had. That time we had together was special.
I remember one night, after we made love, you took a picture of me. You took it with your cell phone. ”I don’t let people take pictures of me naked!” I screamed at you, and you just smiled for a moment before showing the photo to me. My face wasn’t in the picture aside from my smile, so I let you keep it. I often wonder what happened to that phone after your car accident.
Why did you wrap your car around that tree? How did you manage that? Part of me hopes you were drunk. I hope you were really drunk, I… I don’t hope you were drinking and driving, but I mean, I hope you were drunk so you didn’t die in pain all alone on that highway. You were my age. You were beautiful, like me. You were fun, like me, and we had fun together. I realize now that I never said thank you Rob, and worse, I never said goodbye.Submitted by stickyisaslut.
You’re not always going to have the best circumstances available, but if you have a creative mind, and a willingness to make due with what you have almost anything this summer can be fun and bring you enjoyment.
(img via littlewhiskey)
